If you’ve ever found yourself overthinking while your friends just blurt things out with reckless ease, or if you’ve perfected the art of appearing engaged while internally planning an escape route — welcome. You’re human. And today we’ll uncover why the advice to ‘just be vulnerable’ is just plain silly.
We’ll also get into the sneaky push/pull between cultural expectations and our biology, breaking down why high performers struggle with connection, and sharing two super simple practices to make social interactions feel less high-stakes.
What we cover
• The cultural myths that keep us stuck in isolation, despite our innate need for connection.
• How our neurobiology reacts to vulnerability, and why ignoring it makes connection harder.
• The SAD Cycle (Stress, Anxiety, and Depletion) and how it perpetuates disconnection.
• Moving from an orientation of control to an orientation of connection.
Key takeaways
✅ Connection is a biological necessity, not a luxury. Our nervous system depends on it.
✅ Hyper-individualism is a cultural lie. We cannot truly thrive alone.
✅ Vulnerability isn’t just emotional — it’s physiological. Understanding this helps us keep opening instead of avoiding.
✅ Somatic awareness is key. Noticing subtle shifts in the body allows us to catch protective patterns before they block connection.
✅ Small changes make a big difference. Two simple practices—deepening eye contact and resetting between interactions—can transform how we connect.
Action steps
🔹 Note attention quality. Notice not just what someone is saying, but the emotional resonance behind their words. Where is your attention when you’re looking at someone?
🔹 Reset before interactions. Before meetings or social situations, take a few seconds to let go of whatever emotional charge you’re carrying, so you can arrive more fully present.
Join the conversation
💬 What resonated most with you? What practice are you trying this week? DM Oren on LinkedIn or Substack.
📩 Need support in cultivating deeper connection and somatic awareness? Reach out to Oren for coaching, referrals, and practical resources.
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